Opinions

I am learning as I get older that an opinion is merely just an opinion: "a view or judgement formed about something, not necessarily based on knowledge or fact." As long as I remember that, it is much easier to accept someone's opinion without drawing conclusions about their judgement because ideally their judgement is their own. The same could be said with respect to my own opinion. The other day, my daughter said, "The most popular phrase right now is "no offense", which essentially implies I am about to criticize or condemn you but if I preface my negative remark with no offense then by rights you must take no offense. So here it goes: you look fat and wretched today but no offense. None taken!
We live in an interesting time: we post on facebook, some twitter and some don't, some people think that we care that they got out of bed yet at the same we are so afraid to express our thoughts and opinions in the event that we offend someone. When the truth of the matter is that it is merely an opinion. I have noticed several posts on facebook that I would deem rather abrasive and unnecessary; it is to the point sometimes that I wish I hadn't read them but then I remember that it is just an opinion not based on knowledge or fact. I have agreed to react to facts and to those who I believe are knowledgeable and disregard the rest. It has made it much easier to read the newspaper and realize that for the most part everything we read is an opinion and it is our responsibility to weigh the facts. We should never assume anything or take anything for granted. Or if all else fails do some research and then form an opinion.

The age old debate over who pays for dinner?

I laughed this morning when I read an article in the morning newspaper regarding the issue over who pays for dinner on the first date. The reason I laughed is because last week I had a similar conversation with my daughter who is 20 years old. I asked her, "Who pays for dinner?" Her response, "Well, the way it works for me is I offer to pay 3 times; after the third offer I don't offer again." I laughed, "When your father and I were dating one of two things happened: we split the bill or we took turns." She responded, "That is because you were friends before you started dating." My response, "No, it is because I don't believe that men have to pay. We want equal rights yet we are turning back the clock by expecting men to pay if they ask us out on a date?" For me it runs deeper than the simple matter of who pays because I cannot help but ask myself just what is it are they paying for?" I never wanted to be in a situation whereby I felt he was actually paying for something. My next question to her: "What would you do if your date took you up on your offer to pay?" She answered, "That would be the last date."
So I asked myself how is it that in this day and age women still expect men to pay when they go on a date. On most occasions both parties have limited funds because they are students so why is it that the man has to pay. I know that my daughter pays for her own ticket when they go to a concert, or she will attempt to pay for parking or ski passes but still the expectation to pay for dinner is still placed on him. Clearly, despite women's desire for an equal world who pays is something that is unchanged.
When I asked my son who pays? He answered, "I do, isn't that what I am supposed to do?" I answered, "Not necessarily." Of course, it is his prerogative but I was of the mind that it was a partnership. So much for the opinion of a middle-aged woman!